only in chaos are we conceivable - RB

I have a deep affection for Roberto Bolano. His anarchist ways and curious yet truthful observations. His rustic and savage looks along side his feverish and crude writing. He says it right. For me at least.

“The truth is we never stop being children, terrible children covered in sores and knotty veins and tumors and age spots, but ultimately children, in other words we never stop clinging to life because we are life.” 

-Roberto Bolano, 2666

Over the past year, I have been restless with the need to create and with no vision of where I should center that energy, much like a child that can't concentrate. I would jump from task to task while taking on another and committing to something else. It wasn't until my friend, Beca, said just do this and let it be your own. And with that came Inks+Thread, granted some of these patterns are collaborations with the talented Beca Lewis and Danielle Tanner. So with pleasure I show you the patterns for the Spring Scarf Collection. They will be available for purchase later in March. To read more about the collaborations in this collection click the collection page above. 

identity crisis

Chattanooga is having an identity crisis. The area in constant struggle amidst this confusion is the weather. A few weeks ago it decided to tease us with threat of snow. Then we were gifted pre-summer weather thus prompting us to take leisure bike rides and break out the shorts. Now we are back in the throws of winter with an omen of snow yet again, it is bound to be another attempt to provoke us with excitement. I prefer the summer heat: not only because I despise being cold but because I can dress myself with ease in warmer weather. I admitted this to Jaime of She Wore It Anyway before we ventured into another outfit post. Naturally, I am dressed for warmer weather so sucking it up for this shoot was necessary.

To see and read about this collaboration visit She Wore It Anyway. More to come as always.

not my birthday, cake

Attention is a state that I constantly struggle with. The giving of attention is not a problem, but the receiving of attention is troublesome. Being an eternal pessimist means that my first conclusion is to assume that any attention is due to a negative reality. I shy away from being the subject of photos though I am working on this, birthday parties with myself as the guest of honor make me clam up, and all activities that result in going out in public where I may or may not receive stares pose an invitation for stress. Contrary to my nature, I accepted an invitation to speak as a Pinterest expert for the Social Media Alliance of Chattanooga. If having over 10,000 followers makes me an expert then I will gratefully concede. However, I rehearsed the line "I don't know what I am doing here" in front of the mirror a few times before heading out that morning. Even though I was a basket of nerves, it really wasn't all that bad and I think my expertise was pertinent. So I somewhat conquered my fear of attention, but that still doesn't mean I want to be the subject of a birthday party. This is precisely why I was grateful to shift my attention toward another's upcoming birthday. 

Last week was Eric's birthday. I had purchased tickets to a big concert in Nashville, but the artist cancelled the tour. In a panic to figure out another birthday gift, I resolved upon making a birthday cake from scratch. I've never made a cake from pure ingredients. I asked him what type of cake he would most like to consume. His single word reply..."CHOCOLATE." After giving him a few icing options he decided upon raspberry. Perhaps he didn't know that this meant his cake would be pink, but he is seemingly sure of his identity so I went ahead with the combination of Chocolate and Raspberry.
Friday was the birthday and we planned on having his family over for cake that evening, therefore I had to bake this cake Thursday night. I was up until 1:30 am finishing off the icing, which I admit I am not the least bit talented at decorating a cake with icing. However, I am talented at eating the icing with a spoon. Both the recipe for the cake and icing came from The Vanilla Bean Blog. Now I must admit to my buttercream icing addiction and I will conclude this post with the adverse of all anti-drug campaigns... "Just say YES...to Buttercream."

collaboration: SWIA

Though I worked in a field that demanded that I be comfortable in front of the camera, I am not the sort that enjoys being the subject of pictures. Usually photos must be force upon me, but this new collaboration with She Wore It Anyway takes the obligation out of force and implants the concept of compulsion. She Wore It Anyway, is operated by Jaime Smialek of Our Ampersand Photography. Her companionship is dreamy. Nothing forcible, just simply fun and her bright hair serves as a indication of her stellar personality. Below are a few images for our first of many fashion collaborations. Click over to her blog to see the rest of the post.

 

What I wore? Imogene+Willie Jeans, American Apparel top, Vintage scarf as a belt, Lotta from Stockholm clogs. 

What Jaime wore? Shoes from a thrift store in Florida, jeans from WalMart, top was given to me by a friend, flannel thrifted, bracelets from F21 and Nasty Gal, Hat from F21 and sunglasses from Target.

silk painting

It takes great effort for me to sit and be still. The stillness I refer to is inner quietness.  Meditating is something that requires great effort on my part because I am constantly thinking. Sometimes when I mediate it feels like I am walking a crazed dog that is pulling me franticly by the leash. My unquiet mind would be that hyper dog. However, while in India studying Mahayana Buddhism I found myself reaching that stillness. It felt dizzying; like I was sitting in a desk chair and someone was spinning me in circles at maximum velocity. Dizzying and swirling yet pure and calm. I tell you this because the image I had cultivate for this scarf was inspire by this outer body experience.
What is more graceful than a delicate pattern painted onto silk. I have always enjoyed using watercolors as a paint medium. It requires patience and restraint. Painting on fabrics demands a lot of the same technique. After I began painting on silk, it was a full on addiction. Sometimes it is like watching a chemical reaction. Lately, my interest in it has grown since I began my forge project for 2013. I am hoping to expand the scarves I make into a business so stay tuned.

Maintaining a tightly stretched fabric is very important when hand painting silk. Sometimes I use a a fabric stretching frame but the cheaper make shift use of a painting canvas frame with push pins works just as well if not better. I absolutely hate stretching my fabric, without fail something goes wrong or my fingers get raw and worn out. But immediately after the delayed success of the stretching step, I get to concoct the dye colors. This step always makes me feel like I am a witch mixing potions. Perhaps I re-watch my Harry Potter DVD collection too often.   

This scarf is rather basic. It has no resistance lines or pattern created with wax or gutta. But after a long break from painting on silk, I needed to keep it simple. However, there are fun and easy ways to create patterns without the resistance technique, my favorite of such is adding salt. Sprinkling salt onto wet dye draws in the pigments, which creates distortion in colors. I think it looks like a chemical reaction. 

taste and sound of love: a valentines post

Valentines Day has always been the blackened heart holiday for me. Perhaps my ill affection for February 14th stems from the sad events of past. Maybe it is because the candy associated with lovers is chocolate, of which I have little taste for. If the previous assertions haven't hinted, I'll plainly state that my Valentines Days have been uncoupled, flowerless, absent of chocolate and all together unattractive.

However, this year I am determined to celebrate right. I have now been married for almost two months, so this is our first wedded holiday together. About 4 weeks in advanced, I began scouring to find the perfect gift. I couldn't find anything to present to my mister that echoed my love into his ears. So I have made him a delicious morsel: Chocolate Charms with a hint of Coffee. His two favorite delights...chocolate & coffee. I altered the recipe found on the Martha Stewart webpage here. These are not terribly sweet cookies, but they have the texture of shortbread cookies so best serve them with a glass of milk.

My better half blesses me with perfectly curated mixtapes, that are actually in the form of CDs, every once in awhile. I am determined to do the same for him this holiday. Below is my love playlist dedicated to my mister.

traveling homebody

I have proclaimed that I am a traveling homebody. There's no doubt that I am most comfortable at home dining on chips and chewy candies. I'll take a frozen pizza over a crowded restaurant any day. But I have the constant itch to move and do. My restlessness constantly interrupts my homey nature. How to combat this conflict? Painting, baking, blogging. However the most rewarding activity I have discovered is taking scenic drives. Do I sound like a retiree? It feels like a mini trip, a much need escape without the necessary human interaction. Driving into the country seduces the romantic sentiment I have toward leading the simple life, which I know logistically I could never survive.

These conflicting ideals at play in: Rural Urbanite and a Traveling Homebody, only proves that we're all dynamic characters. My most recent outing was a short distance from my home, just a hop from Hamilton County over to Marion into central time zone. I took a drive into the mountains of Sequatchie Valley. Passing by farms and rustic barns, I dreamed up a life of simple existence hugging curves and singing along to Wanda Jackson. I danced with the idea of living in a barn, cozied up to a burning fire and eating pancakes. A world without my cell phone, stop lights or neighbors that swipe your trash can...this happen yesterday.

Enjoy my photos of the Tennessee  landscape. All images are from Marion County close to Ketner's Mill.